Realising my fears…

Recently I’ve had a lot of choices. To choose between what I really want to do or not. And most times I choose no. I think I’ve realised that I’m a bit scared. Of stepping outside my comfort zone and of trying new things no matter how much joy I think it’ll bring me.

Next week I am going to stay with some family members and I’ve decided that while I’m there I’m going to try to, no matter what, to do things that scare me a little. I’m just going to say to myself ‘just try it. Say yes. Do it’ and wish me good luck!!! I’ll keep you posted!🌙

21/01/17 • 22/01/17

Tears run messily down my damp face forming pools on my pillows,blankets, my skin,hit with hundreds of water droplets. Bullets. Whispered words melt away into the silence. A message that’s travelled who knows how far to be heard in another world. But maybe not. Screams of sadness rip through the night up into the sky. Into the heavens, or just into the air. Pools and pools. Bullets. Unsaid words, forgotten forever. What I know I should have told you plunges coldly into my heart. That which I should have said but didn’t to save two people from tears. ‘I love you’

A list of things I want to do…


Grow hair out long and natural

But converse

Take Polaroids

Explore buildings

Leave poems and notes around

Eat natural based foods

Lie (on the beach) looking up at the stars

Take a nightime dip in either a pool or the sea

Go on walks by myself into nature and sit and paint/write/read/take pictures.

Buy a backpack

Be my own source of happiness

Smoke

Get drunk

Say thankyou instead of sorry

Be spontaneous 

Take sunset/sunrise photos

Go on holidays with friends

Play with coloured smoke grenades and sparklers on the beach

Dance in a field

Order takeaways

Go to a concert

Go see live music

Wake up in a white bed covered in sunlight

Go on a mountain hike

Self pierce

Go to a fashion show

Mess about in a shopping trolley

Write a book

Fall in love

Take goals pictures with boyfriend